Did you know that couples who marry in their early 20s face a divorce rate of at least 60%? Last week, I received the news from my 22-year-old son that he and his wife are expecting, which means I am going to be a grandfather.
I should be happy for them as a couple and that I will be a grandparent, but I am not.
Where did I go wrong?
Maybe it has to do with me leaving my kids when they were young. My ex and I couldn’t work out our differences, and I still had my military obligation to fulfill.
I was assigned to a ship, and I would be spending the majority of my time out at sea. I didn’t have the luxury of seeing them as much as I wanted. The atmosphere with the command was “mission first.”
I didn’t want them to grow up in an environment where their parents always fought and thought that was normal.
Instead, the hardest decision I had to make, was to leave them. I wanted them to grow up in a “healthy” environment. I had to accept to provide child support.
Accepting change as a grandparent
I’m slowly accepting the idea that I’ll be a grandfather.
I had a feeling this would happen once I knew that they were married.
I just hoped it would be later.
My concern is, are they financially ready for the baby when it arrives?
They both work for TSA, but what they earn, will it be enough?
Why not wait? My son is in the National Guard and will be deployed later this year.
I remember hearing that my son wanted to have a family before being deployed.
He was worried that he would not return.
I thought that was a bad idea. To leave a young mother to raise a baby on her own.
As a parent, it’s normal to worry. I worry for my kids because I don’t know what the future will hold for them.
What now as an upcoming grandfather?
I need to give myself the time to embrace the change.
While I haven’t met my daughter-in-law.
I have to give her the benefit of the doubt.
Whenever that day does arrive when we are face to face.
I could send them a baby memory book (Affiliate link) as a sign of support.
My son’s mom is concerned as well. We both know that we can only be there to pick up the pieces if we have to.
I just hope I am wrong.
I just have to lay back and be there for them should they need my help.